It's taken me a long time to actually be okay with my appearance. Like, I still think my face needs work, but I don't really dwell about it or whatever.
but I just realized that I don't even like myself as a person. I really don't, to the point where I can't even defend my opinions. I mean, I have them, but as soon as someone disadgrees with me, I'm like "uh" like a fucking dumb bitch and it just makes me want to die inside. I can't even say two words without feeling like a complete dumbass, not to mention obnoxious... idiot. I just can't handle it. I don't like myself. I feel like I don't know anything at all. I don't know why anyone even wants to talk to me. I'm loud and obnoxious and I don't know what I'm talking about most of the time and I just can't deal with it. I feel like I can't do anything, like I just can't and that I'm not going to amount to anything and that I'm not even special, so what am I doing here? I just don't know who I am or what I want and I'm afraid I'll spend the rest of my life not knowing and I can't handle that. I can't. There are so many people that can do everything better than I can, so what am I even worth to the world? Nothing. I just feel that no one likes me and that just because of how I trip up and babble all the time that they'll never want to get to know me. I just don't know. I don't know anything, I don't.
Hi. I'm Angelica. I like Pokémon and complaining. I'm a youngster, but I freak out like a 42-year-old mother. This is just me worrying about getting into college.